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For All Abilities


Jan 27, 2020

For All Abilities – The Podcast Episode Five - Leann Kabat - Thriving with a Different Brain

 

In this episode, I interview Leanne Kabat of The 5 Seasons Life. Leanne Kabat is an author, speaker and host of The 5 Seasons Life Podcast. She created The 5 Seasons Strategy to help people harness the transformational power of every season to be brave and bold in their life, love and business. We discuss the challenge of her brain disease, her struggles in being a wife and mother with a brain that works differently  and her ultimate use of that brain as her super power that allowed her to start The 5 Seasons Life and write books! Leanne also discusses how she helps other women on their entrepreneurial journey.

To connect with Leanne, please go to 5seasonsofconnection.com or follow her on LinkedIn (Leanne Kabat), Instagram @5seasonslife or Twitter @5seasonslife  To order her books go to: https://www.amazon.com/author/leannekabat

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Please follow me on Instagram @forallabilities, LinkedIn (Betsy Furler) and on Facebook (For All Abilities). Go to our website www.forallabilities.com for information on our software that enables employers to support their employees with ADHD, Dyslexia, Learning Differences and Autism.

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Unknown Speaker  0:01  

Okay, it is recordings. I will just be silent for a few seconds.

 

Unknown Speaker  0:09  

Hi for all abilities listeners, please thank you so much for tuning in today. And please remember to subscribe to the podcast on whatever podcast station you listen to. Today I have another special guest with me today I have my friend Leanne, and Leanne, why don't you introduce yourself to my audience?

 

Unknown Speaker  0:30  

Absolutely. Thank you so much, Betsy. So my name is Leanne Cabot and I am the founder and creator of the five seasons life, and I'm an author and a speaker. So I'm super excited to be here.

 

Unknown Speaker  0:42  

Awesome. Well, you have a very unique brain condition. And so I wanted to have you on the show so you could tell the people all about how you are living your full life with this spring condition. So we'll Start with your childhood, although, I know you didn't have the brain condition at that time, but go ahead and tell us about your childhood kind of how school was and what you did after you graduated from high school and all of that kind of thing.

 

Unknown Speaker  1:13  

Yeah, so, um, I was a really advanced student, I was a super reader and I was, you know, a kid that probably would have been beaten up in many circumstances. You know, I was just that, you know, I wanted to answer every question I was jumping out of my seat to, you know, to be the one to, you know, kind of fill in the blanks or come up to the board. Like I was really that kid and it got me very far. You know, I was very successful in high school, I went to multiple different high schools just from moving. And each time I found my space. I was, you know, elected for various offices in different high schools. In my career. As I started out, I was promoted very quickly, so there was a lot of benefit. It to, you know, the power that I felt like I had in my brain could retain, you know, lots of information and just be one of those super performing people. So I had, you know, I operated at a very high level and I love that.

 

Unknown Speaker  2:16  

So tell us what happened when, I guess what were you doing in your life when you got sick?

 

Unknown Speaker  2:23  

Yeah, so my husband's company had just been purchased by a major player in Redmond, Washington. So we had just been moved from Canada over to the west coast and we had moved into our house two months earlier, everything was in disarray. We had boxes just arriving in, you know, from the shipping company. And my husband was called down to California for a business trip. And so life was just very busy. I had two toddlers at home or two young children, a four year old and a two year old, and I was five months pregnant.

 

Unknown Speaker  2:59  

So Wow,

 

Unknown Speaker  3:00  

just a super busy time like physically and then emotionally with, you know, kind of getting two little kids sorted out finding our way in our new neighborhood and then just dealing with being pregnant. I mean, that's always as you know, as strain on you emotionally and physically. So there was no moving parts at the time.

 

Unknown Speaker  3:20  

Yeah, that's a unique situation. Yeah. Tell us what happened.

 

Unknown Speaker  3:26  

So as I said, My husband was in California business trip and I was just particularly tired. So I crawled into bed with the two kids and I just said, You know what, we're going to read a story and we're all going to go to sleep and I don't even know that it was eight o'clock. It was super early. For me. I mean, it was their bedtime but it was super early for me. So we all just crawled into bed we fell asleep pretty quickly and then in the middle of the night, I just needed to go to the bathroom. And so I crawled over one of them. And as soon as I stood up, everything just kind of spun but in a very busy Our way and I collapsed onto the floor. And I bow. And I wasn't blocked out very long because I kind of was able to crack my eyes in the very smallest way. But I was frozen on the floor for multiple hours. I could not move, I couldn't speak I couldn't get up. Like I was literally paralyzed on the floor and I had fallen forward. So I was on the baby, right? I was I was on my own. And that did not make it a less stressful situation. In fact, I was just so panicked. And you know, I was begging and pleading and you know, if I could have cried I would have cried like I was just in such a state of, you know, this frenetic state from that experience. And then a couple of hours later, it was just before seven and then I started to get hot like my whole body was burning things started Spin like vertigo setting in this ridiculously you know pronounced way and I was able to move. So I got myself up, I cleaned up, you know, my mess, I got the children out of bed, I got them some cereal and I went down to the hospital. And I just said we need to check on this baby. And they didn't know what it was, but it really set off this multi month exploration, you know, project so before the baby was born, it was non invasive. You know, there were a lot of tests that that they could do, which wouldn't impact me and then when the baby was born in July, and he was healthy, thank goodness, the testing intensified and I really saw everybody you know, like one doctor thought, Oh, it has to be epilepsy. Let's put you in the hospital for three days and trigger your seizures and one person. I think she might have many years disease or, you know, I think it might be Lyme disease. Let's go check that No, no, it's definitely a blood clot or Wow, I think it's a tumor. Let's check that right. So what Just became this massive, you know, puzzle that everybody wanted to put their piece into the puzzle for and it was exhausting. And I had a newborn we were still kind of finding our way in the world, like it was literally the darkest night of the soul that whole year 2006 was terrible. But in November, they called me back in, and they had all of my brain scans and they had, you know, all of my test results kind of spread out all over the table. And they walked me through what they had seen, you know, you have a p fo, so you have this little hole in your heart, and you have this other little thing. And so they just kind of identified a couple of the test results that would have been significant. And they said, you know, in and of itself, none of these things will cause this problem again, but together, it is this bundling that led to, you know, what we're looking at, which is this hypoperfusion of your frontal cortex, right, like so you have brain damage in this space. And you know, you had to oxygen deprivation and then these other contributing factors have really created this perfect storm. And we don't know what it is. But we know what's going to kill you.

 

Unknown Speaker  7:11  

Oh, wow.

 

Unknown Speaker  7:12  

And I just sat there and I thought, What are you talking about? Like, I have a baby at home, I have three babies at home. I am not dying. And they said, You are dying. And we're pretty confident it will be within five years.

 

Unknown Speaker  7:31  

Wow.

 

Unknown Speaker  7:33  

And at the time, I mean, I was you know, at the time, I was very confused, right. So whatever this condition was, for me, left me in a very altered state, you know? Now I would say, why do you think that you know, or show me the evidence or, like I would have pushed back but in the moment, I was just like, oh my god, they know. They know and I know nothing and I am now dying and so on. For the next three years or so, I really started to die, you know, things started to get harder. My processing was super slow. And I was definitely exhibiting kind of all of the classic signs of executive functioning disorder. You know, I went through a couple of neuro psychologists and I finally got to one who was very interested in digging in and kind of getting into the meat of the problem. And that was probably one of the most fascinating experiences because I had never really taken any classes in psychology. I didn't study the brain. You know, my ex, my education is in journalism and in education, but not in that, you know, kind of holistic psychology way. So I was super, super excited to dig into this with her and, you know, there was a list of many things I know, you know, many people who have executive functioning problems, you know, there's different levels of what the issue is, right? So it's either a working memory problem or there's, you know, initiation issues, or maybe there's time management organization problems. And, you know, there's probably eight to 14 general categories to which you can be, you know, tested against in your function. And as I was going through, it was two days of testing eight hours a day, and I was doing, you know, a variety of tests. So it was definitely not just one modality, you know, I had to build things physically, I had to sort things, I had to calculate things. I had to use an abacus, which I had never used in my life, you know, I had to, you know, organize blocks, I had to move rings on these little skewer, like just all kinds of different tests that they and I'm sure you know, all of these as well. Yeah. And at the end of the whole process, you know, I left her with all of the data Research I had done some IQ testing, and some other cognitive testing and some online things. And I was called back a few weeks after that experience and she walked me through everything and it was really interesting to hear her take, you know, that I was very highly functioning in ways that she would not have expected someone like me to be. And I was very smart, you know, so my IQ was very high and I had very high functioning but the the areas in which I had suffered some sort of damage or some sort of, you know, impact were severely impacted. It was very black and white, there was not well, you know, perhaps before you were also weak in this area, she was like, No, you cannot be as functional as you are, and have always had these issues. These had to have been a result of your traumatic brain experience. Whatever this brain crash was. And so, you know, I wasn't exhibiting things in impulse control, you know, or in some of the initiation areas, which are typical in TV eyes, but I definitely had, you know, things had come up in which my processing was severely broken. So I could take a problem to a certain point, and then it literally just stopped. It was almost then, like, we are no longer speaking English, and I have no clue what to do next. Uh huh. And she was just she found that very fascinating. So she worked with me a little bit longer to develop some treatments that she felt would, you know, take advantage of this new burgeoning area of neuro plasticity, right. So one of the things that she had recommended for me was, you know, my children were young at the time they were still young. And so she asked me to go purchase

 

Unknown Speaker  11:57  

this toy and I was like, oh, Okay, I can get it. So she wrote it down, and I went to Target and I bought the toy. And it was a stuffed animal. And it was, you know, I picked a kitten, or whatever I picked, and the company was Webkinz. And so I came home and there was a code in the little kitten tag. And so I went to the website, I put in the code. And basically, this was, you know, like, a way for children to start learning these basic skills. You know, so it would be pattern recognition or number sense, or it would be, you know, word games or, you know, you build the bridges to help the turtle get across the river or something, you know, like, it was just these very, very basic games. I don't know if I struggled with anything harder than I struggled with these games at that time. And I went back to her and I said, I can't do this. Like I don't know how to build words when you give me six years. Dependent letters that aren't belonging to each other.

 

Unknown Speaker  13:03  

You know, I don't know, interesting, but could you read at the time? I could totally read.

 

Unknown Speaker  13:08  

only read Wow, would not reconstruct a word. And wow, that's fascinating.

 

Unknown Speaker  13:17  

And so this game, this Webkinz, you know, this little, you know, this little program turned out to be one of the most instrumental tools to my healing because as she went through the Webkinz site on her side, she would send me games that she wanted me to play, and I needed to log how I was performing. So like, did I get to 10? You know, how long did it take me to get to 15 points? When did I get to 50 points and all of that. And the point of this game is really, you know, to empower children so that they can build on their basic function, but for me, it was really a way to quickly and pretty accurately figure out where my brain stopped working the way she would have expected to work through a problem. And so I worked on all of these games. And the funny thing was, at the time, I don't even know if Webkinz is even a thing anymore, but at the time, the more you played the games, you earned these points. And you could then use these points to purchase things for your toy, right? So there was an animated version of the toy like this kitten. And so after you earned you know, 1000 points, you could buy your kitten a sweater, or you're hitting some mittens or something. And I got to the point, you know, within probably six months that I had purchased multiple toys, because you could only play a certain amount per day. I guess this was

 

Unknown Speaker  14:49  

right, trying to control the screen time, of course,

 

Unknown Speaker  14:52  

so they were just like, sorry, you've met your maximum hundred minutes or whatever. And I was like,

 

Unknown Speaker  14:56  

nothing. No, no. So I went back to target I bought

 

Unknown Speaker  14:59  

another toilet And at one point, I had multiple

 

Unknown Speaker  15:02  

toys going on at one time. And

 

Unknown Speaker  15:05  

they really like I had enough to buy them mansions, and they all had cars, and they had wardrobes, because it was just a, you know, a reflection of how many hours I spent working through these, you know, basic patterns, and word games and, you know, number things like that. So, that was just an interesting, you know, just an interesting side note on how people could use, you know, something so innocent to really kind of dig into the complexities of brain processing.

 

Unknown Speaker  15:35  

Yeah, and I will have to say that a throwback to my old podcast, your app lady, and I do find that there are so many games out there that were maybe developed for children and all the apps you know, we have so many app games now. But so many of them are so good for, to work on processing, even to work on brain health, you know, just exercising your brain Even for adults, and some of them work can be really fun. Sometimes they're more fun when it's like, you're getting to buy a mansion for your kitty than it is when you're just, you know, getting a checkmark or something that's like so.

 

Unknown Speaker  16:12  

Yeah, I definitely found at the time, so she had recommended some other, you know, brain training games. And at the time, I don't remember what they were called, but they were, you know, more advanced and I felt stupid. And I felt inadequate, and I felt frustrated because I know what I had been capable of before.

 

Unknown Speaker  16:31  

Right. Right.

 

Unknown Speaker  16:33  

To me, it was I just got angry, you know, and I didn't necessarily have anger issues, you know, typically in my life, but I was very angry in this. So when I had found this child program, I, it was a celebration, right? Everything went colorful, and I felt empowered to keep playing and to try the next thing and, you know, when I missed an answer, it was like, that's okay. You can do it again. Leanna Did you know that kind of tender love that you would want for a, you know, a healing brain? Right. And so it was, it was perfect. I couldn't have made it through without a lot of the brain training from that game in particular.

 

Unknown Speaker  17:18  

So once you I guess at some point, you probably reached kind of a new normal with

 

Unknown Speaker  17:27  

your brain being different than what it was before. How, what other like, in, in practical ways as far as, especially as far as your working life? How? In what ways was your brain different and how did you use those differences? Maybe to your advantage, maybe is there a superpower or how did you overcome those, the differences in your brain that you hadn't had before? When you were going into back to work?

 

Unknown Speaker  18:00  

Yeah, um,

 

Unknown Speaker  18:03  

so there's two quick little stories that I will share about, you know, kind of illustrating what that looked like the first one was a little bit earlier. And so earlier in my, you know, earlier, closer to my crash, and my daughter had come to me, she was probably four at the time, and she just asked for cheese string. And I said, Yes, of course, you can have a cheese string, that's fine. So she took one out of the fridge, and she was trying to open it, and she just couldn't. And so she handed it to me and said, Mommy, can you open this G string? And I said, Well, of course I can. And so I start trying to reach for the two pieces of plastic, you know, that you pull apart to extract the cheese. And I'm squeezing, and I'm twisting, and I can't find the end. So I'm twisting a little more. And I'm squeezing it and I'm getting a little bit hot, and I'm feeling flushed, and I don't I'm like, I can't open this cheese. What is wrong with me? I am so dumb. I can't do this. And I'm twisting and I'm squeezing it and so The cheese is getting warm and it started to melt. And I was just starting to bash myself in a way that I had never done before. But it really was an avenue for which I needed to say, Leanne, you can't do anything anymore. You can't do anything. You are so awful. You are so pathetic. And this critic just reared its ugly head and I couldn't make it stop because I didn't know how to open the cheese string. And so I literally grabbed the cheese string, I put it on the counter, I grabbed a cleaver and I chopped it in half, and the two ends of the cheese string went flying in my kitchen and I looked over at her and I was hot and sweaty and confused and angry. And she just looked at me with these huge eyes in terror. And I thought, Oh my gosh, I am a monster. You know, I just felt so much guilt in That moment. And I remember picking up the cheese string and putting it on the counter. I chased her down the hall, I apologized, I was crying. She was crying. You know, we kind of worked all that out. And I remember when my husband got home, I said, Can you can you open this G string? Like, can you show me how to do this? Because I really don't know. And he said, you know, you literally after holding it for three seconds, he said, Oh, it probably is an error from the factory, like the plastic has been fused together. Like there are no two sides to pull apart. Oh, wow. And I was like, Oh, my, you know, but immediately I went to have aligned yourself totally like, I am incapable. I can't do this basic thing. But in actual fact, like, this was just where I went out of my own fear of failing, but if I mean nobody could have been successful because you know, the plastic was fused and so it was just one of those. Okay, Leanne, you need to give yourself a little bit more grace. forward a couple of months, and I was in the kitchen. And I noticed a long, thin black or like super dark brown slug looking like thing on the base of my kitchen cabinets. And I called my sister and she lives in Canada. And I said, Oh my gosh, there's a slug in my kitchen. It's like under the cabinet and I think I'm going to die. And we don't really have slugs where I come from. So I was stressed out about that. I'm like, do they eat you? What do they do? And she's like, Oh my god, what do you think it you know, how do you how to get there? I have no idea. I must have let it in or that came in on the kids shoes. So for two days, all I could do was sit on the floor like 15 feet away and watch this slug and it didn't move. And I called her multiple times. And I said Dorothy, it's not moving like At what point do I just do Do something with this slug, like, do I squash it? Do I scoop it? What do I do? I studied it. And she said, Leanne, why isn't it moving? I said, I don't know. Maybe it's a sleep. And she's like, for two days. Let's can you get a little closer. So slowly over the conversation, I got closer to it. And I got closer to it. And I, you know, took a little toothpick because I was just going to flick at it. Well, I flicked at it, and I kind of cut through the whole slug shape. And I screamed, and she's like, Oh, my gosh, what happened? What happened? And I said, Wait a minute here if I cut it in half, and she's like, with a toothpick. And she said, Leann, are you sure it's a slug, and I got very close. So close, in fact that my nose was almost touching it and I just inhaled. And Betsy, it was Nutella. Oh, One of

 

Unknown Speaker  23:01  

my kids probably made a little Nutella sandwich and draw a number. Yeah, I literally was paralyzed in my house for two days. But, you know, had I had full function, right, I would not have been traumatized and you know, kind of paralyzed by this slub Nutella dripping, but I just couldn't process it in a way that, you know, I was able to overcome. So I clearly had work to do this in terms of like, what are exactly, you know, the executive functioning skills that I am lacking, like, specific, right? Definitely, I want to fix them. So I got very serious in identifying what those were. And then building processes into my day, you know, if it were checklists, if it was, you know, color coding my calendar, if it was to do list if it was family meeting so that we all you know, we're on the same page and if I was missing something Somebody else could help me, you know, kind of put it back in the conversation, we really had to build an infrastructure, right, like change the structure of the way our family operated, because I could not carry all the things anymore as the mother, because I just I couldn't physically like I just couldn't do it. Right. And I mean, of course, that's very empowering for my children, you know, giving them responsibility. They're very, you know, they have developed very strong social and emotional, you know, and kind of organizational skills because of my struggles and my challenges which is going to benefit them for sure. But it also you know, I recognize in my day to day life now as I run my business, as I run my family, I still bump into walls that you know, are lingering situations from my you know, my current and ongoing brain struggles so much as I can be high functioning again, as much as I have had, you know, Training and I've created workarounds. And I have done brain exercises to, you know, help me create new strategies for success. I bump into these walls all the time. And they're just another opportunity for me to say, oh, either I didn't fully make that a habit or Wow, this is new, I need to pay attention to what this is in my life, you know, to see if it had always been there, or right, a new symptom that's popping up for me because I, you know, I continue to have a degenerative brain condition from whatever the initial crashes were.

 

Unknown Speaker  25:36  

And how have you so So currently, I know that you've written a couple of books, two books, correct. You have two books published, I do by far and you are doing coaching with other women. So tell us a little bit about that. And how you think your brain condition has benefited you has given you kind of a different a different perspective on life that other people than other people might have.

 

Unknown Speaker  26:09  

Yeah, I mean, of course, anybody who has some sort of challenge can absolutely get stuck in looking at how hard it is for them versus how easy it must be for everybody else. Right. You know, there's no lie. I definitely I have been there. And I continue to find myself there sometimes. But I think one of the benefits of having this condition, I think there's a couple of benefits, but the main benefit for me and the work that I do is that I was given five years to live and I know it's been 13 right now, but I often think at the back of my mind, is this like a tarot card reader, you know, who doesn't always get the time, right, but they, you know, they know the, you know, the sequence of events that lead up to whatever they're giving you as your fortune. So I just think you know, if they got the time Wrong, what is important? You know, what do I want to have done with my one magnificent life that I wouldn't want to, you know, miss out on if I put it off too long. So, you know, on a personal note and a professional note, I don't waste a lot of time. You know, I wanted to travel. So many of my friends talk about oh, I, you know, I can't wait to the kids are older and I want to travel. And I did not wait, you know, I am on this mission to visit 50 countries before I turned 50 as my pledge to myself, that I can make big things happen. writing a book was a super huge accomplishment because I felt like, you know, I can fool people for so long. But if the words are written on the page, they're going to see through me, you know, they're going to know that I'm struggling in some way. They're going to recognize that I'm deficient in some way. And that's First of all, not the case. But it Secondly, you know, it was an opportunity for me to say, Well, what are the messages that are important to me? Because if I'm feeling like I'm an imposter in some way, then I need to feel, you know, kind of legit and credible in the things that I'm saying. So let me bring the message to be of my core essence, you know, I don't fancy, you know, you know, thinker of all times, no, I need to talk about my message in my own voice, and that authenticity has, you know, proved to be a very successful strategy for me. So, in terms of just coaching other women, I think one of the benefits someone like me has is I don't necessarily want to sign women up for coaching that goes on and on and on and on. You know, I really do not want these very elongated commitments with people because I feel like I can't carry their stuff for that long. So I do these power sessions, you know, I do three sessions with women, and they're like these business brilliance boosts, and we get in, we get down, we get dirty, we get it done. And you know, and then I kind of nudge them out of the nest, and I say, go fly. And when you need to come back, then we come back and do another three sessions, you know, so it's not really, you know, the infrastructure of your life kind of program. It's really, you're stuck, for whatever reason, you are stagnant for whatever reason, you are not feeling confident to move forward with the things that are inside of you. Let's get around that, you know, strategies for that. And I think having a brain condition really allows me to be very open and wild in my processing. So I think of things that I know other people don't think of, you know, and I see things very differently. And I think that's just a huge benefit to my clients who, you know, who sign up for my waiting list to be like, Oh my gosh, how can we work with you? I want more of that brilliance because I can't see the things that you see. So tapping into my intuition is something that has been like another unexpected surprise. And I think we think intuition is all about Whoo. And we think it's, you know, this magical force field out into the universe, but it really is our brain's ability to take the millions of pieces of data that it collects, you know, and it stores we don't get to see all of that, right, like our right filter, so much of what our brain collects, it really just gives us the, you know, the tip of the iceberg, but your instincts and your intuition is the full iceberg under the water that, you know, it's based in science. It's based in data. It's based in hard facts. It's based in observable information. We just don't get to see it all. So we think it's this magical thing. But when you can tap into

 

Unknown Speaker  31:01  

You know, that level of intuition, it really is based on, you know, very solid advice. You know, it really is not, you know, reading, you know, something that you can't see it really is super solid. So just integrating a little bit more of my gut instinct has, has been another benefit, which I know before my brain crash. I didn't trust myself to do that I wasn't really feeling but now, I'm like, this is a superpower. You know, the fact that I can tap into this easier, and maybe it's the training or maybe you know, my neural pathways have been realigned in such a way that I don't have as many barriers in my brain, but I can tap pretty deeply into some pretty fun stuff.

 

Unknown Speaker  31:48  

And that's awesome.

 

Unknown Speaker  31:51  

How so if people want to work with you or keep in touch with you or reach out to you How is the best way for them to Get in touch with you.

 

Unknown Speaker  32:01  

Yeah, thank you. So I'm at the five seasons life calm. My name is Leanne Cabot. You can find me on LinkedIn. You can find me on Facebook.

 

Unknown Speaker  32:11  

Or you can email me through my website at five seasons life calm.

 

Unknown Speaker  32:16  

And your last name is spelled K a b EA t correct jackley. It felt a bat but it said like rabbit so it's Cabot like had not felt that way.

 

Unknown Speaker  32:27  

And your books, where are your books, my birthday on Amazon. They are on Amazon. So the first book was the five seasons of

 

Unknown Speaker  32:35  

connection to your child and it's a parenting guide. And the second book is the five seasons of connection to your business brilliant. So it really is designed to help entrepreneurs pull back some of the layers of you know, shame or guilt or worry or doubt or fear or that they layer on top of their own brilliance and then they can't see it. So we just pull that back so they can actually be who they are meant to be. Their business and in their life.

 

Unknown Speaker  33:02  

Awesome. Well, Leanne, it was a pleasure having you on the show today. Thank you so much for being here.

 

Unknown Speaker  33:09  

Thank you for having me, Betsy. I hope this was helpful for your listeners.

 

Unknown Speaker  33:14  

Yes, I know it will be so thank you and I will see you soon.

 

Unknown Speaker  33:19  

Talk to you soon. Bye bye.

 

Transcribed by https://otter.ai