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For All Abilities


Apr 27, 2020

For All Abilities – The Podcast Episode Eighteen  - Stephanie Robertson

 

In this episode, I interview Stephanie Robertson. We discuss the challenge of her diagnosis of OCD as a very young child and how she has navigated school and work with the diagnosis. To connect with Stephanie, please go follow her on LinkedIn (Stephanie Robertson). 

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Betsy Furler  0:05  

Welcome to for all abilities, the podcasts. This is your host, Betsy Furler. The aim of this podcast is to highlight the amazing things people with ADHD, dyslexia, learning differences and autism are doing to improve our world. Have a listen to for all abilities, the podcast, and please subscribe on whatever podcast app you're listening to us on.

 

Stephanie Robertson  0:34  

Hey, Stephanie, welcome to the for all abilities podcast. Thank you so much for joining me today.

 

Hi.

 

So I'm gonna have you introduce yourself to my audience. And just tell us a little tell us your full name and a little bit about yourself?

 

Sure, my name is Stephanie Robertson. I am 36 years old. I'm a native officer. And I, which we like to say around here is pretty rare. I work for Dell Technologies. I'm in channel sales. So I do business to business through third party value added resources, and it's a little complex, definitely a little stressful. We like to call it the Dell personality. But it's been really good for me and I'm interested to see where you know where it's gonna go in my life.

 

Awesome. Well, we connected because we were in the same sorority in college, but a few years apart, we will Domini and so we connected because of that. And we were in the best already Kappa Gamma Chi and Austin college. And so we I was I had posted that I'm watching this podcast for all abilities and you had volunteered to be a guest I'm super excited, because you have been diagnosed with obsessive compulsive disorder, OCD. And yeah, I am so excited to hear about how that's affected you throughout your life. So why don't we first start with childhood? And I know you were, you had to have been successful at some point in school because our college is pretty hard to get into. So anyway, so tell me what you were like as a child and kind of how the diagnosis came about and, and how your OCD affected you when you were in school.

 

Yeah, so I think the earliest thing that I really remember related to like OCD and just kind of like finding out about it. My grandparents lived abroad. And so they were living in the south of France, and I was about three or four years old. Maybe just Before my fourth birthday, when my grandmother passed away suddenly, and my parents, there was a big push at the time to be very honest with your children. And so my parents, in the interest of being very honest with their children answered all of my questions about death. very honest. And so, you know, when I, when I would ask things like, well, will we all die? Will you die? Will she die? Will I die? Then the answer to that was yes. And they would say things like, but not for a long time. And I think that that's really shaped a lot of my own parenting, for obvious reasons, but part of it was because when I was four years old, I couldn't tell time. And so a long time for me was 30 minutes in the way that I measured. That was a Flintstone.

 

I was like,

 

yeah, yeah.

 

And so for me, you know, one or two episodes of Flintstones or two to Flintstones was a long time. So that was kind of one of the first times that I really then it came to my parents notice that maybe I thought a little differently or that maybe I had, you know, issues working through other stuff differently than other kids did. And so that started kind of coming out a little bit more after she passed and the funeral and my other grandmother moved in with us for some time and she had a lot of issues around food she was big into like macrobiotics and all of the healthy stuff way before it was cool, if you know what I mean. Yeah. And so like, we weren't allowed to shop on the inside of the grocery store. We could only buy things right in the wall, like the outside walls. We had no sugar cereals in the house because those are poison and all that and you know, my little young brain was just soaking all of that up. And so what was healthy to others became really very unhealthy to me and So my parents called the school and they said, you know, she eating at school because she's not eating at home. And of course, that's a red flag and this, this was in 1989. So OCD wasn't really a thing in 1989 like, not even like a social circle, okay. Oh, you know, people are like, Oh, my, my OCD is kicking up, which is a different topic to me now. But like that wasn't even a thing then people didn't add was saying that. And so to my school, it just panicked them. And so of course they call Child Protective Services. Wow. Because they were like, Why? Why doesn't your daughter want to eat at home? Oh, she thinks he's being poisoned. Cool. Why does your daughter think that that you're poisoning her? So like an active services, came into our lives and interviewed our entire family and me and followed us around for weeks before they realized that no, my parents were not actually doing anything neglectful or abusive. That really what I needed was therapy and about what was going on in my head and, you know, kind of set the stage for how does your child think differently? And luckily, they did that I got a counselor, a play counselor, and I think this all went on from about the ages from five to seven, trying to figure out what was going on. And it

 

took me years to identify, oh, how about your parents are still scarred by that whole CPS? Oh.

 

My mom still tells the story and just talks about, you know, just talks about like, being in the therapists office and, you know, the big test today or the big interview day when when CPS came to interview me, and that when they walked back into the office, I guess I'd hidden like, I'd played hide or seek or something so I was little over and my mom didn't see me in the office and she just about lost it like she thought the baby okay. What Yeah, I have to bust through? Ah ha, oh my goodness. Yeah. So we still talk about that. But um, that was kind of the diagnosis and like the recognition and like I said it took, it took a couple of years to identify it and to figure out what do you do with that?

 

Right and sounds like you were a really, really bright child too, which probably made it all worse because you were able to find more information and remember that information and, and yeah, then you're a little brain was just taking that information and doing all sorts of things.

 

Yes, I was reading voraciously from an early age. I mean, by seven years old, I was reading Little Women by Louisa May Alcott. Uh huh. And, you know, I mean, like I said, my grandparents lived abroad. So I had a concept of the world and know that it's more than just driving distance from a young guy. So, so I did, I just took in all kinds of information all the time and tried to find places for it. And it didn't always work out. Because at that age again, you don't, you may have a concept of the world but it's not. It's not the concept of the world, right? Where you're trying to filter it in and make a structure.

 

It was so interesting to me when I had so as you know, my 21 year old son is medically come very medically complex. And he's also super, super bright. And I it was so interesting when he was little how he would make sense of things in the world. Because he was so bright and he knew so much for his age, like he had so many he's always had so much knowledge, but he didn't have all the knowledge, right. So he would, he would move things around in such interesting ways. Like I remember in I think in first grade, he said, Oh, so and so is sick, she's been home. She hasn't been In school for three days, and then he said, I wonder what hospital she's in? And I was like, oh, oh, you think if you're sick, you're in the hospital because that's what his life that's what's his reality. Right. I was like, No, baby. Most people don't have to go to a hospital. Other than that, that, you know. Anyway, yeah, it's so interesting how young children process information and then layers of other issues and your own unique brain structure makes it even more interesting. So how did you do? Were you a good student? Were you over overly over over thinker and all of that kind of type of student? I'm

 

definitely definitely an over thinker. You know, I think one of the things that I it took me a long time to place and to figure out what the OCD is that it makes you very much an all or nothing kind A person. And so in elementary and middle school and you know, the early years of high school, it meant All right, all right, A's or the world is ending. All homework is turned in, or the world is ending, I think I was in fourth grade. And I went to the nurse's office and I was just sick, I was ready to throw up. It was horrible, because I couldn't find my reading books. And I knew that I had put them in my Cubby, but couldn't find them. And I guess somebody had moved them or something from one desk to another. And so I just, I was so anxious about getting in trouble and not in you know, being the bad kid that didn't add them. And, you know, what would happen? I don't even know what would have happened in my head. Right, you know, and that was just, you didn't have to have a consequence in my head. It was just that there could be a consequence. Right. And, you know, I mean, I made myself sick enough to go to the nurse and I didn't have a fever. So finally, they sent me Back to the classroom after I had, you know, wasted enough time that wasn't reading time anymore. Hmm. And hopefully I would not get busted for not having these books. And then when I got back to the classroom, my teacher was like, oh, Stephanie, your books were on this desk. So we went ahead and put them in your cubby for you. I'm glad you're feeling better. Wow, that was it. So much of my school life was like that it was if you're going to win, first place, you participate. If you're going to do this, then then you can compete then you can do these things. So many nights, late nights up. many weeks and weeks and weeks of studying and things like that. And if there was going to be a win, or something like I've done, I would be in it. And then if at some point, I were to realize that that wasn't going to happen, then it was just out completely out of the money. Yes, absolutely. 100% and I learned I learned how to stop competing and things to avoid Like thinking shopping and be interested in some of the things to avoid that disappointment.

 

Wow. So that must have been really impactful on what classes you chose and what extracurriculars you chose?

 

Unknown Speaker  12:18  

Oh gosh, yes.

 

Stephanie Robertson  12:20  

You know, I volunteer for the OSU Humane Society when I was 13 years old. And I was the youngest volunteer that they had ever allowed. And I loved it. I got to volunteer in the clinic with the veterinarians and do like medical things. When it was great. And I was like, I'm going to be a vet, and it's gonna be fabulous. And then my freshman year of high school, I failed algebra. And my sophomore year of high school, I had to retake algebra, and I still barely passed it. And then I heard that algebra to follow that. If you wanted to be a veterinarian that you had to take, Chem, and biology and all of these things that have to do with science and math, and I had failed it one time. So obviously, I was not good at math. And I obviously could not go into the sciences and definitely could not be a veterinarian. Wow. And it totally changed the way that I looked at school all of a sudden it was now you're gonna look at the arts and now you're gonna look at the soft sciences and part of the part of the girls can't do that part of the you can't write up part of that this is just not how your brain thinks. And I turned it off for years. And it was like a mental block just can't do that. And so, you know, I mean, in college, I think my degree is not I think it's in I know it's in political science and psychology

 

that the audience that don't know, we went to Stephen and I both went to a liberal arts college and I was a psychology sociology major with a minor in religion. And I only took statistics I was the only math I took in college and I don't think I took any science.

 

I took sat three times and eat on our professor finally looked at me and he was like, you need this to graduate, right? And I was like, Yeah, I do. He graded one question on my final. And he looked at me like, how did you get this answer? And I was like, I, I didn't know how to do that one. So I made it up. And this is how I did it. He was like, Yeah, I don't know how you got the right answer. But it's right. So

 

yay.

 

Yeah, I just I couldn't science. I couldn't math and I couldn't science for years and years and years all the way through college. And it probably didn't, probably didn't overcome that mental block towards math and finances and science and any of that until maybe five or six years ago.

 

So that

 

Unknown Speaker  14:45  

2030s

 

Stephanie Robertson  14:46  

now you're working for a tech company,

 

computer company, so you're aware. I mean, even if your job isn't sciency mathy techie, every one around you is science a mathy type Do people tell us how you got there?

 

Well, you know, I, when I graduated from Austin college, I wanted to go out and change the world. And you know, I think that's one of the wonderful things about that school is it really encouraged us to encourage us to think big. And it was really hard to think big, and get paid very little. My first few years out of college and I worked in nonprofit and I did all of these things. And at one point, and I worked for a wonderful company called amantha, pet, maybe low cost spay neuter, and and preventive care for cats and dogs. And it was a really wonderful experience but it also I kind of reached a point where I'd I'd plateaued like I wasn't going to move forward without more or deeper experience or more education or just just something more i'd reached kind of as far as I could get at that stage and I didn't want to stay at that stage for another you know, three to five years getting paid, think at the time it was like $14 an hour. And I couldn't afford a new car. And I, you know, my car was breaking down, I lived as close as I could, to the area where we served, which was southeast Austin, where there are bars on most of the windows. I lived as close as I could do that without having bars on my windows. And you know, I got married, and we were looking at a family and all of a sudden, I was like, I can't, I can't pay back my student loans on this. I can't read the family on this. I can't do all of these things. So I need to make a change, whether it's go get more school or go get different experience or whatever the case is, I need to make a change. And right. My husband was very techie. Interestingly enough, he also worked for Dell at the time, but he's very computer techie engineering. He and my brother in law kept saying, Jeff, you need to come to Dell, you need to come to Dell. And so one day we were out to lunch, he is trying to convince Jeff Do you need to come to go and I just looked it up. Like why don't you don't want me back, I can learn how to sell computer will be fine. And literally like they basically had to teach me how to turn it on. And Wow, what's what's in the guts of it and you're going to have these conversations with people about their, their, you know, cloud strategy and servers and their storage and on prem or off Prem or, or hyper converged and all these things that I was like, I don't even know what that is. I can tell you the difference between a laptop and a desktop and after that you pretty much got me and Ernie, listen to music while you're smart, you'll learn and so I was five months pregnant with our second. I was paying still paying for insurance at the time because neither of our jobs provided it. And I went as a contracting agent temp to perm to Dell. And I was like, I've got five months to get myself a permanent job and I'm telling you I applied myself like I never have and I learned That I can learn science and I can learn technology and I can learn numbers and I can do it in a crunch. So, you know, it kind of just, it took that it took that like gut punch moment like, you know, you don't have a choice to fail here. You don't have that luxury of not trying and you don't have the luxury of not winning. You have to do it. Right. Right.

 

Wow, that was a bill, that was a big change for you. And how do you how do you think your CD affected you both negatively and positively in that change? Because that's a that was obviously a major change in your career and the trajectory of your life in general.

 

Yeah, definitely. You know, Dell is it's a really interesting place. I never thought that I would find myself in corporate America. Prior to Dell, I never worked anywhere that had more than 50 employees at my location. Even with my large companies, most of them didn't have more than 50 employees, people And going in there the first time, it was so overwhelming, I just went into building two of the seven in Round Rock, which is one of, you know, the three bases in Texas and horses global company. And so I just walked in there and I was like, Oh my god, this is just this building alone to the city. And it was so overwhelming. But they're also really, really, really inclusive. And they give you the resources that you need, they give you you know, the benefits and the time. And when you talk to your managers, they care to learn about you and what helps drive you. And so I found it to be just a really welcoming and inclusive place. And I learned how to use those weird quirks about myself as strengths. So I took Strengths Finder, for the first time while I was at amantha patent, I took it again, while I've been at Bethel and kind of looked at what are some of the consistent strengths and you know, music all kinds of self You know, understanding tests and evaluations and stuff. But one of one of my strengths is achiever. And I guess that basically, I'm really good at picking goals. And then it's followed by the other strength of strategy. So I'm really good at picking goals and problem solving how I'm going to get there. And then making a list and checking it off one at a time. And I kind of finally just let that OCD piece of me take over in that sense, where it was like, Okay, this is a place where it's actually healthy, to let my brain think the way that it thinks. Yeah. And so let yourself be goal oriented. Let yourself be task oriented. Let yourself figure out when is it right to be attacked versus a big, you know, overhead strategy and and play with it and let your brain figure out what it needs to do. And that, weirdly enough has worked. For me in sales and at Dell.

 

What it sounds like that now what you're doing is perfectly so suited to how your brain works?

 

Unknown Speaker  21:03  

Yes. And kind of

 

Stephanie Robertson  21:07  

make sure difference of the way your brain works differently into a strength for that job.

 

Definitely, definitely. I will say one of the challenges about a job, you know, like mine, in sales, you know, entails you're partially commission, or many people are all commissioned, right? And so if you want to make money, it's there for the making, but you're going to work for it, you know, and so, right. Dell is known you you work hard and you play hard, but you definitely work hard and you're never really 100% off. That's, that's in that that's just a millennial thing or a Gen Z thing or as we're going forward, people want more mobility and flexibility in the way that they work. And, I mean, that's one of the things that I sell. So I understand it very innately. People want to work when they want to work and Where they want to work and so whenever really off your brains always somewhere ticking in the background towards work. And I realized that that that same piece of OCD that made me really good at this job is also kind of a double edged sword. I can't be completely disconnected In fact, the only time that I have ever been completely and totally disconnected from work since I started was on the cruise this spring.

 

Unknown Speaker  22:26  

Well, I was gonna

 

Stephanie Robertson  22:29  

Yeah, I didn't I didn't get to go on the our sorties cruise I was gonna go and I was signed up and then my son was too sick and I just because you are totally cut off. I was like, I can't be cut off right now. But I will have to say I did go on a cruise a few years prior to that with my kids. And it was I was in a panic for the first 36 hours because of the lack of connectivity. And then I was like, Huh, hold on. I can Do this. Oh, let me grab this book. That's a printed book. Yeah.

 

I can read.

 

Or I could just send him out to nothing. And it was It is I, I think cruises are the best thing for people who cannot stop because you are kind of forced.

 

Yes, yeah. Yes. I was so nervous about it. I love my kids here. It's the first time I've ever been not in connection with them. They're, they're four and five. Now they were three and four when we went on a cruise. And, you know, I just had to believe Okay, my parents are with them. My husband obviously is with them. Oh, I'm just going to have to have to believe that okay. And I'm going to have to believe that my accounts are okay at work and people can take care of them. And I mean, I was probably a wreck and you were a wreck for three days. I think I was a wreck for about 30 to 40 minutes. Like while we were going out of port and then all of a sudden I was like, Okay, well here's my tie, and

 

I get mad at me out.

 

I just finally had to let go. I was like, okay, nothing. We're out of Port now like I right, right after was my travel buddy. And she kept picking up my passport and picking up all these things like while we were trying to get on the boat into the gear, Matt, like you need to just stop and once we were finally out of Port, I was like, Alright, we're out of port. I there's no plan to get me back. There's no car to get me back, right? No, that's not me.

 

Yeah, I'm in the middle of the golf now. So this is how it is.

 

Unknown Speaker  24:30  

Yes, exactly.

 

Stephanie Robertson  24:33  

Well, that's what it does. Do you have you ever disclosed the fact that you have OCD to an employer, whether it's Dell or any other employer? Yeah. Okay. And then they have did they do any accommodations for you? Or is it just kind of like they know that so if there's any, anything that happens, and you kind of already have that does that conversation open

 

Um, I've talked like, I mean, they all kind of know about me, I'm largely an open book when it comes to things and I try to do a little bit of education around OCD with people particularly because it is such a no just a saying, Oh, my OCD is acting up or, you know, whatever people like to say, particularly in stressful environments, but I don't really need any, like, work accommodations for it from her heart, like you know, so and I work halfway from home, so two days a week. So yeah, you know, they I kind of let them know what's going on like that, that I have it. If I'm having like a particularly stressful time period where it's really flaring up, then I don't have a flare up is the right term, but when it's really bad, then I kind of let them know ahead. It's mostly around stress and, and they've been pretty good about like, okay, you need, you need a mental health day or you just need a break. day you just need a day off and I'll take, I'll take a day of vacation or a day of PVA we call it personal business PBA and it's, it's time that I can just go so you know, a lot of people use their PBA for for, you know, doctor's appointments and stuff like that. And, and I do with my kids, but I also use it for what I call just a mental day, like when the stress is just getting to me and I just have to go. I'll do that vacation time or PDA time, and my boss is usually pretty good about it, because that's the kind of stuff that doesn't I don't really know what's coming. And they'll just write

 

right and he just kind of at that point need a break.

 

Yeah. Plus my first boss at Dell, so the best thing ever, that any employer could say to somebody like me, when I was really stressing out about it, of course, I was pregnant and what's going to happen when I go on maternity leave and I just got, you know, got officially hired on and all this stuff. And he just looked at me in he, he I think I had to go to the hospital for a check or something and he just He's like, we sell computers, and they're not going anywhere. It'll be here when you get back. And I was like, wow, that kind of grace is amazing.

 

Right, right. I mean, that's one thing I have to say about having my son who has been so medically fragile since he was born.

 

Unknown Speaker  27:19  

And

 

Stephanie Robertson  27:20  

we kind of like, have developed this understanding of if like, everyone's going to live. It's really not that big of an emergency. And, and yeah, I don't have OCD. Or I have really I'm kind of like the, I'm not. I'm the person that I think people think fits in the norm box, but I'm really not normal. But people see, like, if you just looked at me on the paper, and but I am, but you know, you I would still let myself get stressed and think I was in control of stuff that I wasn't in control of. And then through his illness, I really became I'm aware of the fact that really a lot of things that we stress out over really can wane and really aren't that important. It's like it's not really an emergency. And, you know, if everyone's alive, it's not really an emergency. Yeah. So, but it's hard to have that perspective. And our coding does not encourage that perspective.

 

I agree. And I have a bob's like, Man, that's,

 

that's amazing.

 

It was it was really great. And, you know, pregnancy is one of the things that really kind of makes that OCD much more prevalent in demand hormones and everything else going on. And yeah, I didn't know that was my first that was a really interesting postpartum period.

 

Yeah. And I just having a baby. I mean, it's, it's, you know, it's so much responsibility. So much steps that we have to do right. Or you think you

 

have to do definitely right I, I've always been very open about my mental state with my husband. And of course my family knows because I grew up with it. But you know, I mean, after I had john our oldest, I mean, I thought I had it down like I was like, Oh yeah, I'm wheeling and dealing This is great like I had, this is the chair where we feed him and rock him at night. This is where we paid him. This is where we do everything. And it was all within like, one large bedroom and I had like a sink in the in that bathroom like it was a master upstairs in the little little townhouse, and little townhouse. And I had organized for I didn't have to go downstairs for anything. Like I had everything right there where I could just reach it and I was like, Man, I'm really knocking this out of the park until my mom and my sister like, came and got me and they're like you have to leave your house. Here I gotta I have everything. Like I have everything right here. This is how you should set it up. I am doing well. They're like Stephanie, you're not leaving your house.

 

She's maybe you don't have it all together as

 

you know that's what I was like Okay, wow so I really thought that I had this OCD thing down when it came to school or down when it came to work and etc and parenting is what really just knocked it absolutely out of the park through it to pieces had no idea how to pick myself back up together. And you know, I mean, my husband has has a DD diagnosed as well. And there was a few worrying things. Let me tell you. She can't pick up a thought to save his life. And I can't function with the sock in the middle of the room.

 

Right? Oh, yeah, it's hard.

 

It's a little wild. But we finally with kids that kind of helps us learn about each other and off and we regularly say in our home, like you just have to, you have to give me grace. Mm hmm. You have to give me the grace to deal with this. Give me the grace to understand about this and for him also. To recognize kind of triggers or points when his add is going to be an issue. And I'll try to just kind of put down things that I need in order to weather the storm. And he started to recognize the same in me like he knows when things are just going to get really like, gridlocked in my head. And this is how things have to be. And so we finally started to get to that point, you know, six and a half years in with two kids that are four and five years old. Ah yeah, and two crazy jobs, but we've we've finally started to get there and and every time that we start to feel like wow, we really have it all together then, you know, like, a curveball and you have to figure it out. But I do think that one of the neat things is about having Jeff with a DD and his diagnosis and then mine is that we are We each have kind of a unique perspective to respect and appreciate each other's strengths and to be more compassionate and understanding with each other. about each weaknesses,

 

you also probably know more about yourselves than most people know about themselves. You know, because a lot of people have spent that time to really figure out what are my strengths? What are my weaknesses or my you know, and and to be able to know that about yourself and then to the able to communicate it with, you know, with and to someone else. I think that is that's gonna be amazing for your marriage over the year. So what my husband and I have been married for almost 25 years. Well, our anniversary like in a week. And, in fact, I think that's exactly in a week. And I know that our having Henry and all of his struggles made us have to communicate, like you can't go through things like that and not communicate and, and, and being able to be, you know, really communicative, and you know, his, you know, one of my big things is Don't, don't minimize my struggle. My emotion because of your struggle or your emotion, you know, like, like, we can have our own emotions at the same time that that's okay. And yeah, and be able to communicate that and literally say, you know, I know you're stressed, but that doesn't minimize my stress.

 

And exactly,

 

that's been actually hard for me because I'm a fixer, and I want to fix every buddy and everything. And so, you know, I would I, especially in the beginning of our marriage, and when Henry was really little, I would just try to make everything smooth for everyone else. Like, even if it meant me not showing emotion, but that's not good for a relationship. What do you know what you're describing that talking back and forth? I think that's what really that's what really helps. And I think that I think, is a as as I think that is a good thing about having a diagnosis of some sort is that it does provide more insight into how you, you will work in the world. And move around around the world.

 

Definitely, we probably our first four years of marriage, we just kind of duke it out. Like, yeah, thought about those things. We didn't know how to talk about it yet. And, you know, for me with OCD, it's like I said, I'm an all or nothing person. And it's, you know, all winning or if you're going to fail, you just walk away. And so when things broke, then my answer to it was walk away from get over it. Right? Just get over it. And you don't you don't get to mire in mire yourself into depression about it or anything like that. Because then you're never going to get out of there. Yeah, yeah. And I've had to work really hard on learning how to accept that there are feelings and then I'm allowed to feel them. And, you know, that was one of the things that we had a very hard time with, because he's very fighter flight. He is he's gonna fly every time. He does not fight. he avoids it. And I'm like, you get back here and you get over it. did not go well, those arguments, right? And we actually we went to marriage counseling and we thought that they were going to talk about our marriage and like, Well, no, you need to respect each other and you need to do all this. But really actually what they did focus on was they focused on our on our diagnoses, and they're like, you guys, pretty much what they said guys know about yourself, do you know how you function with yourselves and you have to learn how you function with each other, and you have to communicate about yourself to the other person. And that's where we got the concept of, you know, you have to give me grace right now.

 

Yeah, that's great. That's great. I think that's going to serve you well. And your children too. Do you want to add anything else to the anything else you want to tell the audience or

 

are you anything you know, I mean,

 

I always want to say something incredibly profound. I don't always have anything incredibly profound. But you know, I think one of the biggest things just in relation to to my own just weird mental way of Thinking with OCD and everything else is that you know, it's not what people think it is. It's not, you know, oh, I have to have all I mean, I do have to have all my clothes organized in a certain way, but that's not gonna make it or break it thing. The biggest thing about OCD that is so debilitating and so difficult is that feeling of unworthiness and that feeling that you can't trust your gut, that you don't have a gut because everything's always wrong. So you can't trust yourself and you have to create this entire other rational being. And you know, that there is a way for there is a way to function and you can, you can function well and you can even find those things that work for you about it. And talk about Yes, and that when people talk about like oh, my OCD is flaring up or Oh, you know, this is gonna drive OCD people crazy and it's at Facebook with the images were like one line is slightly off right? You know, just to remember that, that that's not what you deal with and not to let it be minimized like that. Because I feel like that just, it tells you mentally, like, really, you can't get over a simple BuzzFeed list, like get over yourself. Mm hmm. You should just be able to push on. And that's not what it is and to not let yourself into let the way that you can get minimized into that because it really is so much more. And if you can figure out if you can give it the weight and the gravity that it has, then you can figure out how to be successful over and beyond it.

 

Awesome. That is great advice. Ds people want to come up, communicate or reach out to you. How should they find you?

 

I am on LinkedIn. And I am Stephanie Robertson. I work at Dell.

 

Awesome. And I will put that in the show notes. Everyone has the information.

 

Awesome. So thank you so much for letting me be a part of this.

 

Thank you so much. This was wonderful. I really am Appreciate it.

 

Thank you. I had a great time chatting with you.

 

Betsy Furler  38:06  

Thanks so much for listening to the for all abilities podcast. This is Betsy Furler, your host and I really appreciate your time listening to the podcast. And please subscribe on any podcast app that you're listening to us on. If you'd like to know more about what we do and our software that helps employer support their employees with ADHD, dyslexia, learning differences and autism, please go to www dot for all abilities comm You can also follow us on Instagram. And you can follow me on LinkedIn at Betsy Furler. And Frank, you are LR Have a great day and we will see you soon.